Granted. It is a futuristic state of the art AI robot phone; it anticipates your every need, does your taxes, makes your coffee, cooks your meals, does manicures and pedicures, massages, laser eye surgery if you need it, tattoos, whatever you want but you become a total couch potato and have no life and die of heart failure.

I wish my farts didn't smell.

granted, but this lasts for one second.


which brings up a joke. why do farts smell

I ish I was funny

granted your so funny you laugh to much that u die

i wish i had a yo-yo

and yes i just wasted a wish on a yo-yo :p

granted, but everytime you yoyo'd, so did your balls

I wish my girl friend wasn't a deva

granted she got a job working in Vegas and now she is a Super Deva

I wish I had an IV drip of Dr. Pepper.

granted, but it's diet and caffeine free.

I wish I had more free time.

granted you loose your job get kicked out of school and all your friends and family die (except those that play ZE)

I wish accounting homework were as much fun as ZE

Granted, but ZE actually turns into your accounting homework

I wish I knew how to fluently speak, read and write in every language on planet Earth.

Granted. But the amount of memory required for this precludes remembering anything else, like how to tie your shoe laces, to put on your pants before going out, where you put your car keys (or your car for that matter) etc...

I wish I were the smartest person to ever live.