Granted, but circumstances prevent you from doing what you know you should do, and you haunted by guilt for the rest of your miserable life.

I wish I had the powers of every superhero ever conceived without any of their weaknesses.



PS. If there really was only one chocolate fudge sundae left in the world., It really would be worth killing for...mmmm

Granted, you now have the power of all superheros including homeless man and acid reflux boy. enjoy your time sleeping under boxes and dry heaving.

I wish i was cooler then the Fonz

Granted. You are so cool that nobody wants to be your friend anymore as they are overawed by your awesomeness. They know they just can't measure up to you. You become totally narcissistic, spend your days at home alone looking at yourself in the mirror and finally decide that everybody else is right: you're too cool for this world, so you kill yourself.

I wish I had a nice cup of tea.

Granted. but it turns cold straight away.

I wish I had a new bike.

Granted, but its a workout bike

I wish i could go rock climbing.

You do only the rocks superheat and become lava partway up

I wish I had an evil llair in a valcano
[ Too easy lulz]

granted but the volcano erupts and you get burned to death


i wish i had a mansion and a corvette

Granted you now are the proud owner of a Hot Weals corvette and a Barbie dream mansion

I wish it were the end of term and that I passed all my classes

Granted, but all of the classes you passed are now obsolete and your major is no longer available.

i wish i could go on a civilian space flight.

Granted. But while in orbit extraterrestrials abduct you and perform experiments on you, including live dissection without actually doing any vital damage. The experience of course horribly scars you for life and you spend the rest of your life in a mental health facility wallowing in your own waste.

I wish extraterrestrials would be nicer to us humans.