Re: My ZE diary

#13
March 02, 2011

Dear Diary,

Mama always said that life is like raiding planets, you never know what you are going to get.
Imagine my devastation, when the last of my fleet crashed into starhooker. Non of the pilots ever made it back alive, their remains disappeared into enemy recyclers. Treacherous hooker that he was!!

The situations becomes ever grave. I spend most of my days trembling in fear, the nights, weeping in terror. Arthas is closer to my planets now, I could feel it. I predict that soon schnitter (pronounced without the "c" and the "n", must be German) will hit the fan, the result will be total chaos...

All my alliance mates have gone into the void, de-fleeted, bashed, eaten alive. The other day Perses whispered to me "I want to tell you a secret...I see dead people..."
His sanity is gone just like his RIPs....

No, nobody can help us now, just you and me, dear diary. (and maybe the Autobots when they finally find us)
Moo...

I have changed!

#15
I have given up my blood thirst ways, my fellow galactic emperors of Zorg.

I will no longer challenge your fleet, the old ways of conflict has become detestable.
welcomed a new way of living - of peace and love. to help young emperors grow, guide them to ascend to the farthest point of the universe
You shall fear me no more. I am everyone's friend from this point on. Feel free to fleet save on my moons, I will give you all my coordinates. Want my resources? No problem, I will share with all, send your ships and come collect. Wealth is to be shared! Only sharing can bring true happiness.

YES! It's true, I am your friendly neighborhood Big fat cow.
Moo...

Re: My ZE diary

#17
dear diary

Wow that is so good to hear bfc now i can come out of hiding and finaly have a fighting chance...like c'mon we are talking about chuck noris here who can stand up to his awsomeness thankyou for sparing us oh wonderfull bfc now my prayers have been answered from the zorg gods so can i realy fleetsave to your moons oh thank you sir thank you please send me the coordinates........
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Dont fear death welcome it...

Re: My ZE diary

#18
dear diary...
Today me and m gf had some iscream(hehehe)... got home had sex(this was sooo cooool)... then i took a dump... hell my poo stinks- it was like a rotting dead animal after you poopoo on it and pee on it and then leavefor 2-3 days to rott then burn it and boil it and leave it a few more hours to infuse... it was really nasty- like some evil poo monster was in my belly- ok enough about it- then i flushed cleaned and opened a window smoked something- then i saw it- the golden squirrel - it was running after a lion to catch and eat it- i grab my plasma torch and i jump from the 2'nd flor- i tell you i had wings- right on the ground and i start running after it- the dam thing was fast- i was speeding- mach 1/ mach 2/ mach 3- hell i was riding the sound that was around me- than the sound became color- and i found out something- i was not moving in the universe- the universe was moving around me. interesting so i was wondering how did the space folding happened- i started looking at the data and then cpt picard appeared and told me how to do it- that is how i found out how to go faster than light- then a zen master came(he had the face like my grandfather has when he is on the toilet) and showed me for 100 days how to unlock my true potential. then i was going via a wormhole in the universe and i meet saint john and he told me to some some weed with him... hell i said to my self - why not- but then he wanted some opium - i was against it cause it makes me shake like a dildo..this guy then got mad and we started to fight- after i hit him with Andromeda he backed off and called god- god now is a nice guy... the rest i will tell you tomorow my dear diary- right now - i need to pee
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I highly recommend pissing yourself followed by a course of praying to your impotent god.

Re: My ZE diary

#19
Dear Diary,

Why is BFC telling everyone my *SQUIRREL*


If you expect the unexpected, doesn't that mean the unexpected becomes the expected and the expected the unexpected, thereby creating a viscous circle?
_________________
“One mark of a great soldier is that he fight on his own terms or fights not at all.”

― Sun Tzu, The Art of War
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