having the bar set at 10k is alright. you have the time to develop your techs and mines and defense. get an understanding on the game. after 10k you get to learn how to hide your fleet or loose it. its a lot better to get broken in with small fleets then it would be with a larger one, all the time farming to get the resources and time spent building... you don't need a strong alliance to be a respected player. you just have to be a smart player.
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all the information you need is in the forums. their is countless battles on strategies to how you should make a turtle, how big planets should be and temp for mining. how you should start your first fleet.
in short. your defenses should be big enough that guys don't want to spend the deut to launch at you, and if you clean the resources frequently or spend it. and keep your fleet in the air moving to moons... don't attack people that are on line... it keeps things rather easy and basic.
and if some one is bashing you just because they can. just ask some one in the top 30 to deal with em. chance are that person while start giving that guy a taste of their own medicine. we would rather keep as meany people around so we can farm them
how i'm still around.... no one knows...