#55
by KarrothMelu
This thread has gone off the road to win and into the ditch of fail. But it's ok. I am here to set this here thread back on the right track. If any of you wish to seek my expert advice on how to become win and not fail, feel free to enroll in the new service I am offering, a series of lessons entitled "Why You Aren't Win, Why I Am Win, and What You Can Do To Become Win." In this comprehensive collection of win, you can learn what you have been doing wrong this entire time. In fact, I can guarantee that your win rating will improve. If it doesn't, you will get a full refund!* But hurry, this is a once in a lifetime offer, and if you don't get a spot, you have only yourself to blame for not taking the opportunity offered to you. The cost is 20 Zorg Rubies (That's right, only 20 rubies!!) per person per session. Make all payments to me, KarrothMelu, and get your win on the way!**
*Some exceptions. Read terms and conditions for full details.
**Disclaimer: This offer is not real. There is no "Win Seminar." However, if there was, you could really use it, considering the face you're reading the tiny print at the bottom of a clearly fake advertisement for a service you think you might actually need. But it's ok. There is still hope for you. For only 30 Zorg Rubies, I can teach you how to not be so susceptible to false advertising and rip-offs!*** Take up this rare offer now and you'll never find yourself squinting to read tiny text that doesn't actually say anything on the bottom of an advertisement for something that doesn't exist ever again!
***Disclaimer: This offer is also not real. You should really get a self-help book or something, because you are still reading this tiny text. Or at least go outside. When is the last time you've seen the sunlight? Probably your second grade birthday party, the one where you walked in on the clown "entertaining" your sister in the spare bedroom and got grounded for throwing the cake at the nice old lady who lives across the street when she tried to pinch your cute little cheeks. Ya, that's right. I know about that. And instead of going to lock your doors and windows, you sit here reading a tiny block of text that is utterly and completely pointless. Congratz. Good luck in life, knub.
****Also, pi≠3
Forum Moderator: The Chill One ~ Gale Points: 52
The only thing standing between me and immortality is death.