Great story writing galez very fun to read

OMG are you a novelist?!?! Because if you're not, you should be! I help my cousin with his book writing sometimes, just throwing out ideas here & there. Let my brain rest & re-read what you wrote a couple times, & maybe I could throw you a few ideas too.

“We know nothing of the queen,” she informs her crew, “not of her crew, of their whereabouts, or what has happened to them. We’re vigilantes. All we do will be behind the scenes; right underneath Sinister’s nose. We will retake the throne of our people. They are the ones suffering under this man – this one man – and his rule. He will be stopped.”

As they approach the only habitable planet in the system, they notice much has changed. Something is wrong…a total of six ships orbit around. No mining colony would ever host so many on its borders. Now nearer, a pre-recorded message hails them as it does to all approaching ships,

“Come and reap the harvest! Come ahead! There’s plenty for everyone. Metals, crystals, fuel, and slaves; we have it all! The next auction will begin in…-[three points six hours]-.”

“Slaves? Slaves on one of our colonies? You’re joking!” the lieutenant shouts.

“Enough,” she puts her palms on the railing in front of the ship captain’s chair. Options pop up into her head for plans. Sifting through the possibilities and consequences, she comes to a decision: free the people, take the ships, kill those responsible.

“Listen up. One hundred of you will enter each ship here. Take care of the slavers and break the chains of the slaves. Give them the control of the ship. If they don’t know how to run it, a few of you stay behind and help out – message me with an update. We’ll meet up in the next system. Colony Pandemona…” she takes a deep breath, “I’ll send all of you the coordinates as you leave. Be careful. The rest of you: to the surface with me. Anyone not worthy of living on this planet will die by our hand.”

Exiting the brig, she focuses herself for the battle ahead; trying not to think of the slavers as her people anymore, but as enemies. Lightning equips the armor made for her, tightening straps and buckles, and refuses to look at herself in the mirror. After grabbing her gunblade, she’s off to the deck.



As plans go, it’s brash. But, the thought of the free people of her empire turned to slaves for manual labor…or worse, brothels…set her off the edge. Her crew and her kill without mercy. The slaver ships in orbit quickly came into assistance at the hand of those once held captive. The admiral of that colony shows up to the scene in front of her – covered by a wall of law enforcement agents – telling her that if she cannot accept the colony’s new changes, to not interfere with anything and be on her way. She kills him as well…along with most of the law enforcement. Guns blaze, bullets plunge, and her blade finds its home in many chests and throats. After hours of retaliation, those responsible for everything finally begin to flee the planet and she orders the halt of the attack.

Her men cheer for victory, but she is still unsettled. They don’t see it the way she does. She sighs largely and walks up to the obvious, tall, auction platform.

“Everyone here is free to go wherever they please. My crew has commandeered the ships of those who have wronged you – and this is not the end of our journey. Anyone wishing to join us in freeing the innocent people of this universe from the tyranny of that monster on the throne - speak now. Those staying here will be given the resources to build your own defenses and set up a new system of government until Sinister has been taken down. His fall is inevitable. I will make sure of it.”

Three hundred people joined her that day. The ships she acquired were stripped, cleaned, and equipped to her liking; ready to attack. Lightning was informed by those who joined her that every planet was a prize. New laws stated that if one takes one by force or is forfeited, the planet belongs to them. It’s bittersweet. How many more of her people that have turned from their loyalty will she have to kill in order to save those left? However, a more crucial obstacle is foremost in her mind.

She must return home…

For the longest time she has hated this planet; but the barren, destroyed city in which she once lived will be a perfect place for an area of operation. It’s overlooked and abandoned. With her plans to conquer it as well, she will build her rebel force there whilst they take back all other nearby colonies and new recruits. The banner of the lightning bolt would soon fly over many planets leading to the capitol itself…and then fly over it also.

This is amazing.You should Consider putting this on FanFiction

I am honored to be a part of it.

I can handle awkward.

been really busy but finally had time to read this love it great story so far